


in the arms of your absence

by victoria_p (musesfool)



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Background Deckerstar - Freeform, F/F, Post-Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:01:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26290786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musesfool/pseuds/victoria_p
Summary: They can use each other to feel good instead of letting Eve and Lucifer make them feel bad.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Mazikeen
Comments: 17
Kudos: 63





	in the arms of your absence

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers through s5e01: "Really Sad Devil Guy." Title from "Salt" by Marilyn Krysl.
> 
> What's that thing where two people have sex with each other but it's really all about someone else? That's what this is. (No, seriously, if there's tag for that, let me know.)

Chloe knows he had to go, knows it was the responsible thing, the _right_ thing to do. She still begged him to stay. And he still left.

The world is darker without him—colors are washed out, food has no taste. Chloe would mock herself for being a cliché if it didn't hurt so much.

Maze appears at her desk two days later, ready to work. Chloe figures why not—at least she actually works for the department—and takes her along to the scene of the next murder she catches.

Maze is...Maze is _a lot_. She's a kick instead of a grin, a knife instead of an innuendo. If Lucifer was a velvet glove, Maze is an iron fist. If Lucifer was toeing the line, Maze is two miles over it and still running.

Chloe doesn't care. She catches the bastard who killed his ex-girlfriend, and when Maze says, "Let's go to Lux," Chloe shrugs and follows.

Maze doesn't treat her like she's fragile, like she's just had her heart broken. Maze doesn't even treat her like she's human. Maybe she doesn't remember. More likely, she doesn't care.

Chloe doesn't care either. She goes shot for shot with an actual demon and has the hangover in the morning to prove it.

Maze offers her a flask in the coffee room. "Hair of the dog?"

But that's a line Chloe won't cross. "Nah, thanks."

Maze shrugs and drinks.

Chloe's days start to follow that same pattern. Maze is a fantastic partner, which Chloe didn't expect but which she appreciates. They fall into an easy rhythm, working all day and then hitting the dance floor every night.

When Maze presses her up against a wall in the back of the club, her thigh pressing up between Chloe's, Chloe lets her. Despite what Lucifer might think, she's not a prude. She was an actress once, and she grew up in Hollywood. She's had her share of teenage experiments.

Maze is nothing like Jenny Hendricks from the set of _Hot Tub High School_. Her mouth is hot and tastes of bourbon and she's not afraid to use her teeth. Chloe gasps and moans in surprise at how good it feels. It's been so long since anyone touched her, and Maze is nothing but hungry kisses and wandering, grasping hands. She gets her hands up under Chloe's shirt and doesn't care that they're in public, so Chloe decides not to care either. She arches up to rub her peaked nipples against Maze's palms through two layers of clothing, reveling in how good it feels.

She kisses back, hungry and angry and not nearly drunk enough to forget the ache in her chest. If Maze can make the ache between her thighs go away, she'll take it.

But when Maze tries to lead her upstairs to Lucifer's apartment, Chloe shakes her head. "The car," she says. 

Maze clicks her tongue and says, "Good choice, Decker."

She tosses Chloe into the backseat of her own car and crawls over her like the apex predator she is and Chloe can't help but gasp again at the sudden pulse between her legs, at how wet it makes her to be caught in Maze's laser-like sights.

They don't talk. There are no soft words of love or shared jokes, just Maze's growls and Chloe's gasps. There's no fumbling, either. Maze knows exactly what she wants and how to get it, and Chloe wants to give it to her, wants to forget that she didn't get to have this with Lucifer, that he left even after she begged him to stay. She's not the only one he left, and that helps, that Maze is hurting just as much as she is. That they can use each other to feel good instead of letting Eve and Lucifer make them feel bad.

That's what she tells herself, anyway, as she bucks up hard into Maze's hand. Maze has three fingers twisting deep inside her, making her see sparks. She bites Maze's lip when she comes, and Maze laughs into her mouth, wild and pleased.

Chloe lets Maze grind against her thigh until she comes as well, still a little dazed from her own orgasm and recognizing that she should probably do more next time than let herself be taken like the heroine of a romance novel.

She shouldn't have worried—Maze isn't shy about demanding reciprocity and Chloe lets that demand carry her along for a while. Night after night they get each other off in the backseat of Chloe's car, or up against the employee entrance of Lux, the metal door rattling as they fuck. Sometimes Maze takes her to an apartment (it's probably not Maze's apartment, but Chloe chooses not to ask; she doesn't want to know) so they can spend a little more time taking each other apart and trying to put each other back together again in ways that hurt less.

It never hurts less. 

Chloe's never been one for random hookups and she's always gotten too emotionally involved to make friends with benefits work, but this thing with Maze is lifeline, the two of them clinging to each other in their abandonment.

Chloe's pretty sure Linda would say it's not healthy, but Linda isn't _here_. She's all wrapped up in being a new mom, and Chloe remembers what that was like. She can't begrudge Linda the experience, even if it leaves her and Maze alone to deal with everything together.

She could reach out to Dan but he's on some new age positivity kick, and Chloe doesn't want to be positive and talk about her feelings. She wants to scrape her edges raw against Maze's razor-sharp mouth and well-muscled thighs. She wants something that can help her forget and Maze can give her that in the sweat and liquor-soaked darkness of the car or the night or some random apartment. Maze can give her a few moments of bliss at the end of a long, hard day with someone who is also drowning in being alone.

And Dan doesn't _know._ He's still innocent and ignorant and she can't take that from him, not after everything else he's lost. Not that he'd believe her. Lucifer had told them the truth from the beginning and they'd both scoffed, and for Dan, that hasn't changed.

No, Chloe thinks, Maze is what she's got, and they're going to get through this together.

And then Lucifer sends a demon up from hell to help her solve a case. He's still thinking of her. And she's still in love with him. As easy as it's been to fall into this thing with Maze, Lucifer is still the best partner she's ever had.

She and Maze both deserve better than what's happened, but they're not going to find it like this, losing themselves in booze and each other while both longing for someone else.

Chloe manages to convince herself—it's actually easier than she expected, once she hears from Lucifer. She can only hope to convince Maze, too.


End file.
